2012-04-15 - 1:43 a.m.
Work is my anaesthetic.
It started out with the friend's reminder, then the tweet, then several unexplainable incidents, then the outburst of emotions in front of the bestie, then only I realised I was starting to move a little backwards.
Okay, maybe 'outburst' was too strong a word. Nowadays nothing else can be considered an 'outburst' after that toughest period of time.
But it was, a case of being lost for words and just feeling the tears well up once again.
Lucky or what, work started piling. Past few days have been crazy, I basically ran in and out of office and when I'm not running, I'm really cracking my brain over preparation work. Plus the menses and the lack of time for proper meals, I ended up really feeling the fatigue today, but it was still another long day. But I'm glad all went well still, efforts paid off, production now is already more than half past the month's target.
Maybe I should just keep on working and working and working. And I mean having the mind always on cases and clients etc. Cos once it's not, it drifts to things I shouldn't be bothered with but I can't help thinking about.
I don't know why she told me about it, but as usual, I kept my nonchalant look. But I got to admit, I am still affected. Maybe a little touched that you still care, maybe a little sad that it's too late anyway, and maybe also a little angry that if you cared, why didn't you do more.
Either way, they were useless thoughts anyway.
Please kick the bad habit of nostalgia.
Please quit doing funny things.
Please concentrate on people who truly love you.